oh my goodness it has been so so long since I have posted something. I actually had to check and see what I had posted last to see what I needed to catch up on! Well the kitchen is painted red now - but it still needs a little bit of edging touch-ups so no pictures have been taken yet. Also I repainted the bathroom so I will take those pictures when the paint tape comes off! I got some pictures printed out of our last year together for a project that I am really excited about. The coffee table in our living room is great but I wanted to make it more personal. I decided to choose pictures and glue them onto the table along with some favorite quotes and verses. Then I'll lacquer over it to seal it all up and then we have a piece that is all about us and our memories together! I'm going to start that after Disneyland trip.
I posted the above picture because I like it - pretty simple. We were at our friends John and Vanessa Wathen's wedding (such a wonderful night!) I love weddings almost more now after my own then I did before I was married. It just reminds me so vividly of the love that Ben and I have for each other and how much love God has for me and how preciously he takes care of my heart. I love love love weddings!
I am reading this book Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. I have heard a lot about it the last couple years but I had never read it. I'm borrowing it from Marcia Kuyper and I am loving it. I have been taught most of the beliefs that are in this book and I agree with so much of the book. A theme of this book is to test and probe what you are taught and what you read anywhere. I do this at times but not very often. I have the ability to deliberately think through and mediate on scripture and I do this in passing as I am driving or as I am reading the words but I don't regularly take time apart from reading to mull over what it is saying. I want to do this with Velvet Elvis because there is so much that Rob is saying.
One of my struggles in life is listening to people talk about how important counseling and therapy is and at the same time others talk about how important focusing on the positives in life is and not living in the past but in the present and looking only towards the future. Yes our past is there to teach us but what other role does it play in my life? How much should I think about how my past affects my daily life? Should I take time and think through the times that I was hurt and scarred in my childhood and adolescence or should I accept God's forgiveness, grace, and healing and then move on. Does it take more than that to heal from past hurt? I don't know - but I want to keep learning and growing.
Another theme that I am grasping is that the Bible is living and active. I have heard that sentence probably 1,000 times in my life form adults trying to prove that the Bible was important and I should read it and care about it. It never worked. I didn't care about what the Bible said until I accepted the love that God was so desperately throwing at me! Once I realized that God loves me and there is no judgment, condemnation, guilt, or striving. It's just me and my completely accepted being and the joy of living out of God's love. The journey has been amazing but what this book is revealing is how the Bible was alive when it was written. I didn't know how intentional the writers were in thinking through who their audience was. They wrote exactly what their audience needed to hear to believe in Jesus. And so many of the same verses are exactly what I need to hear to believe in Jesus. It's amazing. Every time I read a passage I hear God wooing my heart. I can't believe how blessed I am that God chose me for this wonderful journey and life that he has for me.
Shalom is one of my new favorite words. I might name a child that :) hahaha my husband would never let me do that! It is similar to the word peace. I love having peace - I love peace and quiet, I love a peaceful friend, I love a peaceful evening with my husband, I love the comfort and the joy and rest that is in peace. Shalom is like peace intensified. It is God given goodness and wholeness. I have a desire for that and I don't think I have that in my life. I still care WAY too much about what other people are thinking about me and not about God and his life for me. I am not very good at doing the day to day tasks with God. I trust him, but I haven't figured out what honors him and what doesn't. Isn't that weird? I've lived all of my life knowing God's commandments and stories about God but what about the things that being him glory and how to honor God in the minutes of the day? I don't think about those things very often. I think a lot about what God might "want" from me or what other people want from me but not about what will bring God glory and honor and what does my love for him desire me to do. Just recently I am thinking more about that. I hope that I am able to test and probe this book, the Bible, other people in my life to live this life in the most God glorifying way.
It's after midnight and I have work tomorrow. Those are my thoughts for now. I'll probably wait til after DISNEYLAND to post again.
1 comment:
Laura - You're just so awesome. I don't think I tell you that enough. But I love hearing your heart. I too am realizing that the Word of God is not something to fear. I think that has been my problem - I am afraid of what God will teach me. It's a paradox because I truly believe that God is a loving God, but his Word is kind of intimidating.
btw: one of Tyler's friends from high schools name is Noah Shalom... I kind of want to marry him just so I can get his last name because I have always loved that word.
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