"In my distress I prayed to the LORD and the LORD answered me and set me free!" This is how I have been feeling lately. I feel like there are so many ways my life could turn out and I so badly want to live a life out of grace and love and freedom. I have witnessed lives that are lived for God but out of fear. I hate fear.
1 John 4:18 "There is no fear in love for perfect love casts out fear. Fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." I want to be made perfect in love! I know that I will never be perfect on this earth but I believe that I am righteous and that is enough for me.
I feel that my husband and I are living this life so well right now. We love each other, we talk, we fight, we reconcile, and we aim to see each other as Christ-in Laura and Christ-in Ben even when we are having our worst days. We are incredibly happy and feel so blessed with what God is doing in our lives and what he has provided for us. We definitely are not perfect - we are learning what it means to be a wife and a husband.
As I read my Bible more I am finding myself falling more in love with Jesus. I decided a few months ago that I need to set time for me and Jesus. That our relationship is not going to just "be deep and meaningful." I knew that I would need to put an effort into the relationship. Spending time with Jesus is deepening our relationship and therefore making mine and Ben's more full. I am just scared of who I can be without Jesus. I am afraid that I will try to control my life. I am afraid that I will hide myself from others instead of being real and truefaced. I still pray to Jesus and ask him to keep me humble and trusting him. But I still worry about what other people think of me. I hate that about myself but it is true and I think that if I acknowledge it in myself I can start letting God change me and take that fear away from me. I am done with it.
In my distress I prayed to the LORD and the LORD answered me and set me free.
About Me
- Laura
- My name is Laura. I'm 24 years old. I'm married to Ben and we are going on 3 years! That number makes me feel odd like I should be old and then I remember we got married very young - so we are still young. We have a dog named Kofi and live in a cute red brick house. We are on a journey and would love to share that journey with you. Read on.
1 comment:
Laura, I think you are brave because you are not just writing about what you do....but you are unveiling who you are discovering yourself to be. Thanks for trusting some of us to share that journey with you. It may be messy at times...well, lots of times...but the journey is what it is all about.
Love you my friend, keep writing!
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